Wilson Towers

First Baptist Church of East Rivercrest sits a little southwest of East Rivercrest High. It's one of those super mega churches attended on Sundays by bored, lonely, susceptible housewives and their terrible children. Every now and again, when there isn't an important football game on, the wives will be able to drag their husbands to church. But, oh, wait... that's right... they don't care. While the only man they should be interested in at church is Jesus, they are more than likely swooning over Reverend Franklin Towers.

No one ever talks about it. None of the horny women that is, but people who don't go to the church and the teenage female members of the church that go to ERHS do. As a matter of fact, it's so taboo, that even Chryssy Bale blushes at the mention of her dear pastor.

"Yeah, I was at church on Sunday, Becca," Jadria said as M and I passed her in the hallway. Becca Gandolfo was apparently evangelising again. "You really don't need to even try to get me there on a Sunday. My mom is all about church, and rightly so! Rev. Towers is so hot!"

Right at that moment, Chryssy walked by, basically burned a hole through Jadria with a ridiculously pungent glare, and then resumed her conversation with her friends.

"Ugh, Jadria has a point though," she giggled. "Rev. Towers is... truly a blessing." She smiled as she started up the stairs. "Oh, hey, Wilson! How is your dad?"

"How the hell should I know?" said a rough looking guy with messy jet black hair and ripped jeans coming down the stairs. "I'm pretty good though... why don't you come over this afternoon and let me show you?"

"Oh, Wilson, I could never fool around with you! Your dad is my preacher!" Chryssy squealed. "You're so silly!" she giggled with a flirtatious shove. Wilson pervertedly followed her ass up the stairs and almost tripped as he got to the last step.

"Ugh, Wilson Towers," M gagged. "I wish he had tripped."

"What's so wrong with him?" I asked. "I actually respect him for thinking for himself and not mindlessly following what his dad thinks."

I've always respected Wilson Towers. He is probably one of the only people at ERHS that I can say that I like more than I despise. He is rude. He is vulgar. He is not incredibly smart. And he's not picture perfectly handsome. He's just a regular old bitter teenage kid, fed up with the life that he is supposed to live.

Usually, Wilson towers has one huge episode a year that requires a week or so suspension from school. Freshman year, he cussed out Coach Powers for calling him a weak little church boy during the Presidential Fitness Test. Sophomore year, he got drunk with first year teacher Ms. Risengast in the English department supply closet. Last year, he interrupted a Fwish meeting by busting in and playing Smells Like Teen Spirit on his saxophone. He hasn't had his run in for Senior year yet, but we assume that he will go out with a bang.

One reason I think Wilson is so bad ass is because he sees the hypocrisy within his family... that, and he is basically a whore for attention. Truly, his dad is a good man, but he neglects Wilson, his mom, and three younger brothers for all of his church business. Wilson's mom really couldn't care less, though. No one knows for sure, but rumor has it that she could not be further from a preacher's wife. No one ever sees her around town, much less in church on Sunday.

At one point in time, First Lady Darlynn Towers was a name synonymous with beauty, grace, elegance, and sweet hospitality. Not only was she the first lady of First Baptist of East Rivercrest, head of the Junior League, Rotary Club, and Hands on East Rivercrest, but she was also the top selling real estate agent in the county. One summer, Rev. Frank went on a missionary trip to Russia, and it's said that Darlynn took those three months to sow her royal oats. By the time Frank was back, their picturesque 4 bedroom Victorian house was up for sale, Darlynn had resigned from all three of her leadership positions in the community, and left the real estate agency where she worked to start her own. After a huge fight that almost split Rev. and Mrs. Towers, they sold the house, moved into a 3.6 million dollar 8 bedroom estate (which is said to have a his wing and a her wing), and Darlynn opened the Towers of Dreams Real Estate Agency. The agency closed its East Rivercrest doors after only 11 months and moved to the city where Darlynn has meetings over cocktails with high rolling designer suit wearing CEOs and CFOs in order to sell them quarter-mile high penthouse condominums for their time away from their suburban wives.

So as one could imagine, Wilson and his brothers are usually left to their own mischief while their mom is in the city and their dad doing the church thing. The Towers are actually so busy that they are unaware of Wilson's yearly terrors at ERHS and his brothers' equally offensive mishaps at the middle and elementary schools.

Yet and still, the East Rivercrest community flocks to First Baptist for weekly inspiration and uplifting sermons on what would Jesus do?